Treading On Familiar Ground...Laeti's Vision

It seems as though I've lived here before, I've walked this way before, smelled the spices in the air, heard the same drumbeats...Yet I am looking at everything with a new set of eyes. Eyes that see as a stranger sees. Am I a stranger, or is this where I belong? If I do belong, why does the ground seem unstable under my feet? Why do I take tentative footsteps?

36 hours now since my return. Nice to hear familiar voices filled with warmth, nice to see familiar faces light up with joy and nice to have friends planning a get-together to celebrate my return and my new job. Been to see my new employer, looks like I will be very busy for at least a year. Nice to know that I will be using my brains once more, that my abilities will not waste away.

Paula, friend and confidante in Singapore, said that she admires my courage. Said it took guts to confront and change my life 180 degress. I don't know if it was guts - why stay on the same path when it leads nowhere, and we aren't happy going nowhere? It would be more logical to change directions, discover new challenges, always keeping our objectives within sight.

What is my objective? It is still to work as a teacher in a third world country. Yesterday I received an e-mail from Laetitia that really warmed my heart :

ESCRIBE, DIBUJA, EXPRESA, SE TU MISMA Y PERSIGUE TUS SUEÑOS, no tengas miedo, tienes tantos talentos Hay una sola via posible en la vida: "ir p'adelante". tengo una vision: 2 cuarentonas en un pais del tercer mundo (el que sea), una educando niños y otra peleando por sus derechos adivina quienes son :-P :-D Te abrazo fuerte fuerte fuerte.

I believe in this vision, and I will work towards realising it. I hope that I have enough strength in me; those who have been my pillars are a world away now to walk with me on this which is my homeground. Isn't it bizarre, to have pillars of strength so far away from my roots? I can only carry them in me, and hope that my footsteps on this familiar ground will eventually lead me to Laeti's vision.